A hard topic to cover in my role really as I often empathise with the emotions the mother is feeling. But this is a true reality for a large percentage on women in the UK. I feel I must write about it because I want you to understand when you possibly think I must be all about breastfeeding, I’m not. It’s got to work for the both of you and it will never be my decision as an IBCLC to say you should or shouldn’t breasteed (unless medically indicated which is rare) it is yours as a care giver to decide because it’s your life of which you have charge of.
As an IBCLC I will support you through trying everything to keep a feeding relationship going and I will support you through the reduction of a milk supply if you request me to. That’s my job, to help you reach YOUR feeding goals and decisions.
Breastfeeding is hard work and sometimes there’s been so many hurdles put in your way before you find me or other reliable support that you might just want it to all stop. Be reassured you most certainly are not alone in this emotion. Thousands of women sadly get tripped up time and time again from bad advice, difficult delivery, pressure that was meant with love about things like sleep or weight gains or losses from family and friends.
If you choose to stop breastfeeding this is where you can find information on that:
https://kellymom.com/ages/weaning/wean-how/lactation-suppression
https://www.laleche.org.uk/thinking-of-weaning/
Rest assured if you find skilled support for breastfeeding such as me as an IBCLC or trusted breastfeeding supporters who are trained (like breastfeeding councillors) and you want to try and save your feeding relationship we will do our utmost to help you achieve that, it might not always work, and you might decide it’s not right for you and your family but the reassurance when you’ve got some trusted support and information will hopefully help you to be at peace with your decision .
Human milk is a wonderful thing and if breastfeeing itself just isn’t working you might want to consider exclusive pumping or using safe human donor milk as an option.
Becoming a parent and in particular a mother or primary care giver is a really steep learning curve. One that is hard to describe to any one who hasnt been through that process yet (often because they wont believe you!) For some the starting point can be really full on and really rather treturous, add in breastfeeding with complications to that and its a recipe for a really hard time for mum and feeling alone while often experiencing pain can just be all too much.
If you can find skilled support before that from somebody trained in the true mechanics of breastfeeding then the future might seem a little bit more manageable.
Have you been at tipping point with breastfeeding and found some one who really helped you? Sing their praises in the comments.